Minions, Emmys, Only Connects - Facebook posts

A month of Facebook posts, cos they've got to go somewhere.

Sept 2: Excellent, if unexpectedly sad, programme about some of the British artists at this year's Venice Biennale. We're going to Venice this week so we were worried about any art getting spoilered for us, but in fact it just gives you a taster. We know, from having gone before, that there's sooo much art in Venice we won't see a fraction of it. The sad part? Khadija Saye, the central person in this show, died in the Grenfell Tower fire after this documentary was made. We get an interview shot in her flat in Grenfell Tower! That is a weird thing. Anyhow, we can recommend this programme (and can't wait to get to Venice).



Sept 4: An interesting phrase came up on a Facebook flashback post this morning: "Everyone needs to laugh, especially these days." I read a lot of that sentiment, and I always have. "These days". What's so bad about these days that's worse than the past?

Is it more a reflection of the writer of the statement and their increasing pessimism and disillusionment or do a significant number of people really think that the state of the world in 2017 is that abysmal?

It could be the week in particular that the writer of that post, from September 2014, was writing. About which I can remember little. I know it wasn't the year when all the celebrities kept dying and we voted for Brexit and Trump.

I know it wasn't the year we went to war in Iraq and Afghanistan, or the year Princess Di died. I know it wasn't one of those years when Reagan was president and we lived in constant fear of nuclear war, or when Thatcher was in charge and it was all ghost towns and riots round here. Was it as bad as the 70s which I remember as a mess of skinheads, bin strikes, power cuts and IRA bombs? Or was it the 60s, when they assassinated a president and went to war in Vietnam? Or the 50s when everything was rationed and we lived in prefabs on bomb sites? Or the 40s when they made the bomb sites in the first place?

In short, I quite like it these days. Am I mad? Here, have an Abbott & Costello sketch (which was the subject of the original 2014 post of which I spoke).



Sept 4: Thank heavens for Minions. Last night we especially enjoyed the Minions movie cos we needed cheering up after watching animations at the Bristol Festival of Puppetry. The animations were good, they were called Cabinet Of Curiosities, but my god, how dark? There was a horrible one with holocaust victims depicted as balls of string, then an even more nightmarish one with dead bodies and no happy ending. Czech and Polish animations, with all that entails. And shown in such an order that we'd totally forgotten the less bleak ones in the middle by the time we came to the end of 90 minutes of films, and all exited shell-shocked and depressedly miserable. Quite the most dispiriting film show I've seen in a while (but well done Puppetry Festival for showing a challenging programme. But, blimey.). So, thanks again Minions. You made it all better. Banana!

Sept 8: Oh well done AI guy. You just signed the death sentence of hundreds of people in Saudi Arabia, and Nigeria and 100 other countries where they were just waiting for this sort of thing to cut out the middle man. Now one scan and you can be accused, imprisoned and killed. And I bet this seemed such a lark when you invented it.


Sept 10: Well, we were just laughing out loud, sat here in bed of a Sunday morning watching the pilot of Mr Winner. Once you get past the rather gag-heavy radio-style first half of the script, the farce is brilliant. Stay for the aquarium scene and I think we've got a new Mr Bean / Some Mothers Do Ave Em here.

Sept 14: Okay, got a topical Only Connect for you. What do these companies have in common?

Technics

Panasonic

Nationwide Building Society

Barclaycard

A: Sponsors of Mercury Music Prize

Sept 15: Quick question - where the hell do I see any of these TV shows? I've just read the contenders for the Emmys, and there's only three or four I've actually seen, a couple more I've heard of, but most I've neither heard of nor know where on earth you can see them (in the UK). Anyone know?

Big Little Lies
Feud
Genius
The Night Of
Full Frontal With Samantha Bee
Real Time With Bill Maher
Baskets
This Is Us
Transparent
American Crime
The Wizard of Lies
Silicon Valley
Black-ish
Atlanta
Better Things
Celeste

Sept 17: I bought a lovely Kull The Destroyer comic at the weekend (antique shop in Gloucester, £1), a real gem by Roy Thomas and Mike Ploog from 1973. What a reminder of how comics have changed since my childhood. Look at those colours. All over the place. Hardly a splodge stays within the outlines. Why was this? I mean I love them, but this was state of the art 40 years ago, and it very much emphasises how the line work was paramount and the colour art almost a second thought. How do other comic art lovers feel? Is this naff colouring a problem or a joy? And do the present day uber-photoshop-painted comics pages make them better or worse?


Sept 21: Thanks to Lew Stringer for prompting me to a bit of research on comic sales. Having learnt that US comics struggle to sell more than 50,000 a month these days, I've found a site that not only shows you US comic sales for every month from now back to 1995, it also has some sales figures from the 1960s. Check 1966 out. Batman was selling 898,470 copies a month, and another half dozen titles sell half a million an issue. Poor old Marvel are just outside the top ten (selling less than Archie comics) with Spider-Man selling 340,155 a month. I appreciate I may be the only person interested in these things.

Sept 23: My Facebook feed is equally split between people who think the way Uber treat their drivers and endanger the public is bad, and people who think the way Uber saves them money and gets them home at night is good. (There is a third group, including me, who has never taken an Uber cab so has no idea what everyone's talking about.) Given the way lots of right-minded, good & liberal people are defending Uber, I'm guessing Uber aren't as bad as sweatshops and slave labour? Or are people in London just really self-centred?

Sept 24: Oh well done my bank. My bank (who shall remain nameless for, cough, security reasons*) have redesigned their website to make it unnecessarily hard to use. Until the weekend, if you wanted to make a payment, it displayed the words "Make A Payment". Now, have a guess. Which of the blobs on the left hand column is the Make A Payment blob? It took me two incorrect stabs to find it.

* I know, I know

Sept 26: Stories that may not have made today's Metro down in England. Mark Millar is awarded the Tennents Golden Can.

OK, got a Tea Time Theme Time for you. What do these three songs have in common?

(We Don't Need This) Fascist Groove Thang by Heaven 17
Do You Remember Rock 'n' Roll Radio? by The Ramones
Happy New Year by Abba

A bit of a fiendish thing this, feel free to guess. I'll be amazed if anyone gets it first time. 

ANSWER 

All three songs have lyrics that are past their use-by date.

Do You Remember Rock 'n' Roll Radio? by The Ramones
"It's the end the end of the century, it's the end the end of the 70s"
- out of date for 17 or 38 years, whichever way you look at it

Happy New Year by Abba:
"In another ten years time, Who can say what we'll find, What lies waiting down the line, At the end of '89.."
- out of date for 28 years

(We Don't Need This) Fascist Groove Thang by Heaven 17
"Reagan is President Elect"
- this was out of date before it even came out! Reagan was President Elect from November 1980 till February 1981 (after which he was President, obviously). The single was released in March 1981 and the album came out September 81.

**********************

Sept 28: Let's see. On Thursday I worked face to face with 75 accountants in London, then on Friday flew in a crowded plane, then on Saturday worked with 60 kids in Northern Ireland, then on Sunday flew in a crowded plane, then on Monday flew on another crowded plane and worked with 60 primary school kids in Stenhousemuir, then on Tuesday I worked with another 60 primary school kids in Falkirk, then flew in another crowded plane. I can't imagine how it happened, but here's today's light reading. Wikipedia on The Common Cold.

Share20 Tweet1 Share0 Share32

Kev F Sutherland, as well as writing and drawing for The Beano, Marvel, Doctor Who et al, runs Comic Art Masterclasses in schools, libraries and art centres - email for details, and follow him on Facebook and Twitter. View the promo video here. 
Read more at http://kevfcomicart.blogspot.com/#7kfjDE7vEwt9ClPE.99

Hefner Quiz

Hugh Hefner turns out to have been a more divisive figure than you imagined. But has he split my Facebook friends cleanly along gender lines? Let's have a fun quiz. Here are quotes about Hefner from my Facebook timeline today. But who said them? A man or a woman?

1) RIP to the legendary Hugh Hefner! I’m so honored to have been a part of the Playboy team! You will be greatly missed! Love you Hef! Xoxo

2) What a horrific, seedy creature he was.

3) Sorry to hear about Hugh Hefner. I've always had a liking for him, and I appreciated his support of cartoonists.

4) I hope someone reads "Stop the cocks" at his funeral.

5) Before any more of you make fun of Hugh Hefner on the day he died could you at least try and READ a copy of Playboy from the 1970's?
We were all blessed to be on earth at the same time as that great man.�Anyone can virtue signal to their friends but that man brought great articles and interviews to the largest collection of wankers this world has ever seen.

6) Hugh Hefner - a man for who money was no object, but women were.

7) NEW COLUMN: Hugh Hefner - my tribute to the King of Sex.

8) Hugh Hefner's funeral is going to have more sad bunnies than the end of Watership Down.

9) Hefner wasn't a legend, he was a prick. Have a word with yourselves.

10) Hugh Hefner is probably the only guy that's died and not gone to a better place.

11) Hugh Hefner....the keeper of the lady petting zoo has died.

12) Hugh Hefner jokes reinforce rape culture. Bad.

13) "Is it in yet?" - Hugh Hefner's grave.

14) So maddening to hear the bull shit today about Hugh heftier been a sexual revolution for woman liberation hahaha .. Women threw them self in front of horses for a revolution to be able to do what they want with their own mind and body ... that's a revolution NOT Hugh Hefner by controlling woman giving them curfews and taking a cut of their money he has done nothing for a sexual revolution for woman , if that's the case every man who lives off immoral earnings and controls woman is not a criminal yet a revolution.

15) From guys: “Rock on, Hef! We’ll miss you!”
From women: “Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”

16) RIP Hugh Hefner, such a shame he won't be around to see his girlfriends grow up.

17) ‪Hugh Hefner has gone to the top shelf in the sky.‬ ‪

18) As per his wishes, Hugh Hefner’s body will be left in a fort in the woods for other kids to find & pass around.

19)  I liked him, I understand why some people didn't. RIP Hugh Hefner.

ANSWERS

1) Female. Kim Kardashian
2) Male. Doug Segal
3) Female. Ivy Dennett Thorpe
4) Male. Ed O'Meara
5) Male. Glenn Wool
6) Female. Juliet Meyers
7) Male. Piers Morgan
8) Male. Tony Cowards
9) Male. Martin Walker
10) Female. Rachel E Jay
11) Female. Janey Godley
12) Male. Brian Kuetler
13) Male. Michael Legge
14) Female. Luisa Collina
15) Female. Peri Lyons
16) Male. Paul Tylak
17) Male. Martin Mor
18) Male. Patton Oswalt
19)  Male. Wil Hodgson (later amended to: "Edit: A lot of rather eye opening shit about Hugh Hefner's behaviour has come to my attention since I posted the status below. I have left the post up in the spirit of acknowledging mistakes")

Potatoes, Cats & Trumps - new comics by kids

This week has been a bumper time for Comic Art Masterclasses and for travelling. Saturday saw me doing two classes at Strule Arts Centre in Omagh doing two sellout classes that produced these wonderful comics you see before me. It's great to be able to fly to these various destinations and to know that, with a combination of hire cars and guest houses - and by flying Friday night and returning Sunday - I can get anywhere within reason. Bring on those international trips I say.

No sooner had I returned from Northern Ireland than I was back on the plane, Monday morning, to Glasgow airport and then to St Bernadettes Primary in Stenhousemuir, where the two classes (the second of which was in fact Primary 6, which I accidentally labelled on their cover as Primary 5, because P6 is the equivalent of the English year 5 and... whatever) had a common theme on their minds. Sigh. Still, always fun to do a Trump drawing, and to add to the vast library of Trump covers that's been building up.

In an unlikely coup of scheduling, I managed to get two days in a row close to each other, spending Tuesday at Victoria Primary in Falkirk. Their covers, both by Primary 6, were food related fun.

Furze Down School in Buckinghamshire is a Special Needs school, and it's a bit of a triumph for me being able to make my class work with kids of all abilities. As with every other group, everyone produced a comic strip page and went away with the A5 photocopied comic containing all of their strips and their individual caricatures.

Another oddity, which I do occasionally, is a Comic Art Masterclass at a party, in this case a 9 year old's birthday party at a church hall in Potters Bar. It's a little harder to keep the kids focussed sometimes, especially if they weren't expecting this as their entertainment, but by golly it worked, and 15 8 and 9 year old girls make a grand comic (and birthday girl went home with the flipchart drawing, as you can see).

The celebrities these nine groups chose for my demonstration strip were Donald Trump (twice), Kim Kardashian, Selena Gomez, Ariana Grande, Michelle Obama, Tom Cruise, Simon Pegg and (very much fallen from popularity this year, but hanging in there) Simon Cowell.

Kev F Sutherland, as well as writing and drawing for The Beano, Marvel, Doctor Who et al, runs Comic Art Masterclasses in schools, libraries and art centres - email for details, and follow him on Facebook and Twitter. View the promo video here. 

Village Voice & Dotard - more new Socks videos

Continuing their recent trend of topical videos that have reached their use-by date before they've even been uploaded, the Socks have done the cancellation of The Village Voice and something Kim Jong Un said about Donald Trump. Sorry posterity, it meant something at the time. Click the pictures to enjoy Village Voice and Dotard.

The Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre do a tiny bit more Shakespeare in Halifax (Oct 26), Wolverhampton (Oct 28), Nottingham (Nov 4), and Goole (Nov 17) this autumn, returning with a brand new show in 2018. Stay tuned.

"It's a tough choice, Kev" - Booking.com's daft ads

"It's a tough choice, Kev". No, it's a stupid advert, Booking.com. Is there anyone for whom this advert would work?

I've just been to Venice, I'm currently staying in Falkirk, and I've just booked a room in Edinburgh. So why do Booking.com's algrorithms think there's any sense in sending me a personalised email trying to sell me rooms in Venice, Falkirk & Edinburgh? The place I've been, the place I'm in, and the place I'm already going to?

Do algorithms not have the plain common sense to work out their customers' patterns? I have stayed in hundreds of booking.com hotels. Rarely if ever do I stay in the same place twice in rapid succession. And I tick the box saying that these are business trips. Can an algorithm not be programmed to work out when a person goes to a variety of places for business, usually only the once?

Even if they were working on the "If you like that, you'll like this" principle, could they not find some common factors between destinations and plug that way? You went to Venice, maybe you'd like Berlin or Prague? Instead of, as they're currently doing, going "I see you took a city break to a european cultural hotspot, here's an idea, why not just go to the same place again?"

Booking.com buck your ideas up or sack whoever does your direct marketing. They are idiots.

John Lemon & More Science - new videos from the Socks

A couple more videos from the currently productive Socks. More Science, an inspired bit of follow up to last week's Science routine (subtitled and unsubtitled) from an audience suggestion, from which I can see more scope.

John Lemon (subtitled and unsubtitled) was inspired by a topical story which, as is the way with these things, isn't even much of a memory less than a week later. I should have learned the lesson that topical humour is the surest route to being forgotten by posterity. So what video do we do next? (At time of writing I already know what we've done next. Idiot that I am.)




Ratings for recent videos:

Saturday 23rd Sept, 8pm:

John Lemon - FB 1527 views, 75 likes, 32 shares, 5996 reached. Youtube 230 (u) 100 (s)
More Science - FB 3283 views, 112 likes, 66 shares, 10,988 reached. Youtube 111 (u) 57 (s)
Science - FB 4000 views, 116 likes, 81 shares, 10,633 reached. Youtube 154 (u) 110 (s)
Westlife - FB 2000 views, 69 likes, 44 shares, 6291 reached. Youtube 205 (u) 79 (s)
Eurovision - FB 35,000 views, 294 likes, 673 shares, 90,240 reached. Youtube 431 (u) 210 (s)
Only Rock & Roll - Not on Facebook. Youtube 291 (unsub only)
Undarntale - Not on Facebook. Youtube 288 (unsub only)
50 Money Jokes - FB 2300 views, 53 likes, 57 shares, 8137 reached (all unchanged since Sept 3)*. Youtube 283 (u) 150 (s)
Jodie Whittaker - FB 53,000 views, 342 likes, 681 shares, 117,085 reached (all unchanged since Sept 3)*. Youtube 1602 (u)
DUP - FB 154,000 views, 1000+ likes, 2595 shares, 461,860 reached (all unchanged since Sept 3)*. Youtube 5745 (u) 1124 (s)

*These stats are curious. Facebook views keep rising steadily for a month or two then, since I last checked, the two oldest videos have frozen. Not a single extra view or like or share or reach in 20 days? Suspicious. I have been doubting that these were real figures in the first place, as they are so dissimilar from the Youtube response. Now I really am dubious.

The Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre do a tiny bit more Shakespeare in Halifax (Oct 26), Wolverhampton (Oct 28), Nottingham (Nov 4), and Goole (Nov 17) this autumn, returning with a brand new show in 2018. Stay tuned.

Comics by kids - the real thing

Comics by kids in my Comic Art Masterclass - the real thing.

If you've not seen my class, you might not realise what the actual comics the kids take away in their hands look like. Well here's a small pile. A5 photocopied comics, with their caricatures on the back and inside, and every single one of their comic strips somewhere in the magazine. These mini epic productions take me and my nimble fingers about 10 minutes to make on an average school photocopier (after we've done the class itself, which can be done in just two hours, with up to 30 kids at a time).


Then, as an added bonus, when I get home I colour the covers and email the coloured version back to the school to display, as a bit of free aftercare service. You're welcome. I'm still taking bookings into 2018, so if you want my Comic Art Masterclass, don't hesitate to get in touch.

Kev F Sutherland, as well as writing and drawing for The Beano, Marvel, Doctor Who et al, runs Comic Art Masterclasses in schools, libraries and art centres - email for details, and follow him on Facebook and Twitter. View the promo video