Hotel, motel, Holiday Inn. A year on the road.

My I've done some travelling this year, and some flying and some staying in hotel rooms. More, I think, than any previous year (I'll tot it all up shortly). Occasionally I can be arsed to take a photograph of my hotel rooms.

Some have notably big bedside lamps:

(That's The Point Hotel in Edinburgh. Very designer, ergonomically challenging.)

Some have excellent views:

(White's Hotel in Wexford. Some surprisingly impressive new architecture in Wexford.)

Some have bathrooms as big as a house:

(Abu Dhabi. Massive bathroom. What more can I say?)

Some have very big windows:

(This room in Edinburgh was taller than it was wide or long.)

And most look a bit like this:

(This is in Dublin but it could be anywhere. For the record Campanile's have the best free wifi throughout and good breakfasts but you have to pay extra for them; Ramada's have an annoying TV service and the internet is by cable only so good luck using your iPad; many hotels start breakfast too late to be of any use if you have to travel or get to work first thing in the morning, I mean breakfast at eight? Who's that useful for? The presenters of World At One maybe; and I managed to avoid Travelodges all year so cannot report whether they've started giving you soap and breakfasts yet.)

Kev F

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Not-stradamus. How my 2011 predictions turned out.

Paul Cornell, on his blog, has set the the fun game of guessing what will happen in the next year. He's set 30 questions, and lots of people have had a stab at being Nostradamus. Below are my guesses. But first let's have a look back at my own predictions for 2011 and how they panned out.

MY PREDICTIONS FOR 2011 and how they panned out. So far.

The website PaddyPower.com does a nice line in Novelty Bets. I didn't put any money on, but just for fun what did I predict for 2011?

Bet: Who will replace Chris Moyles as Radio 1 Breakfast DJ?
I predict: Fearne Cotton 12/1
Result: Chris Moyles stayed in the job

Bet: First band to officially split in 2011?
I predict: McFly 8/1
Result: Wrong.McFly are together and two of them won reality shows. I was so close.


Harry Judd from McFly, officially not splitting in 2011

Bet: Who will win London mayoral election in 2012?
I predict: Boris Johnson 8/11
Result: Not happened yet

Bet: Who Will Play Alex Hurricane Higgins in his biopic?
I predict: Simon Pegg (no odds given, so 200/1?)
Result: No biopic yet

Bet: Who will play the next James Bond?
I predict: David Tennant (no odds given, so 500/1?)
Result: Not announced yet

Bet: Who will play Holden Caulfield in the film of Catcher In The Rye?
I predict: The fat kid out of Mad Men (Sally's friend?) No odds given, so 200/1?
Result: Not announced yet

Bet: Who will win Oldham & East Saddleworth byelection?
I predict: Labour 1/6
Result: Yes, I was right.

Bet: Who will win the Nobel Peace Prize 2011?
I predict: Vladimir Putin (no odds given so 100/1?)
Result: Wrong. It's a bit like I wasn't taking this category seriously. The three joint winners were Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, Leymah Gbowee, and Tawakkol Karman.

Bet: Which volcano will be next to erupt?
I predict: Totally unheard of one that's not erupted for 200 years. (no odds given, so 50/1?)
Result: Sort of right. The first to erupt in 2011 was Grímsvötn, which was totally unheard of. It is, however, Iceland's most frequently active volcano.

Bet: Next actor to play Superman?
I predict: Milo Ventimiglia (no odds given, so 200/1?)
Result: Wrong. Henry Cavill? Who the hell is Henry Cavill?

Bet: Who will win US Presidency in 2012?
I predict: Sarah Palin 10/1
Result: Not happened yet (but my candidate's already out of the running)

Bet: Who will be the next BBC Trust Chairman?
I predict: Joan Bakewell (no odds given, so 100/1?)
Result: Wrong. It was Chris Patten.

Bet: Who will win Eurovision?
I predict: Croatia (no odds given, so 10/1?)
Result: Wrong. It was Azerbaijan. Croatia didn't even make the final 25, getting knocked out in the semi finals.

Bet: Who will host the Brit Awards?
I predict: Russell Brand 6/1
Result: Wrong. It was James Corden. He wasn't bad.

Bet: Will there be a White Christmas in London?
I predict: No. (You get 11/4 on it being white, what's that make non-white?)
Result: Not happened yet, but not looking likely.

So, my predictions for 2011, putting aside the ones that haven't happened yet, shows I have a Nostradamus rating of Minus 5, edging toward a Minus 7 or 8. In fact I only got one thing out of 15 completely right. And on the plus side, I didn't put any money on those bets, therefore saving myself a minimum of £15 and a potential fortune. Well done me!



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THIS TIME NEXT YEAR GAME, Paul Cornell's 30 Questions
(You can join in at Paul's blog, he is inviting your replies and, I think, offering a prize to the person who turns out to have guessed closest next year< In bold below are my stabs in the dark.)

1: Name *one* musical act, other than any that took part in (that is, was a contestant in) TV talent show The X Factor, that will have a UK Number One single (on the standard chart the BBC use) between February 1st, 2012 and December 13th, 2012.
Jesse J

2: Who will be the British Prime Minister at midnight on December 12th, 2012?
David Cameron

3: Who will be credited as writer on the last issue of Action Comics that comes out before December 13th, 2012?
Paul Cornell

4: Name *one* writer (apart from Steven Moffat) who will write a script in the next season of Doctor Who (specials and charity episodes don't count).
Paul Cornell (I really really hope)

5: Will life on another planet (not necessarily intelligent life) be generally regarded by the scientific community as having been discovered before December 13th, 2012?
Nope

6: Which book will win Best Novel at the 2012 Hugo Awards?
I Partridge by Alan Partridge

7: What about Best Dramatic Presentation: Short Form at the same Awards?
Misfits, series 3 final episode

8: Will any of the 2012 Academy Award (Oscar) nominees for Best Picture be (within a generous description) in the genres of science fiction, fantasy or horror?
Yes (War Horse and Hugo)

9: Name *one* historical figure (apart from H.G. Wells) whose name will be mentioned in a new episode of Warehouse 13 broadcast in the UK before December 13th, 2012.
President Nixon (Until I read this question I'd never heard of Warehouse 13).

10: In the three Test Matches played between England and the West Indies in May and June 2012, which England bowler will take the most wickets?
Sorry, I'm Scottish and therefore do not recognise Cricket as a sport.

11: Will any more missing episodes of Doctor Who be discovered before December 13th, 2012? (I know some of you are just going to say 'I hope so', but only concrete answers get you points.)
Nope.

12: Name *one* author with a story in the June 2012 cover dated edition of Isaac Asimov's Science Fiction Magazine.
Paul Cornell

13: Name *one* (with all episodes existing) Doctor Who story that will still not have been released on DVD (in the UK) by December 13th, 2012.
Dimensions In Time, Children In Need Special

14: Name *one* (new, not reprint) Marvel Essentials volume that will be released (in the USA) between June 1st, 2012 and December 13th, 2012. (You don't have to give a volume number, just name a series.)
Ghost Rider 2099

15: Which musical act will provide the main title theme song of the 2012 James Bond movie, Skyfall?
Coldplay

16: Will the physics community generally accept (to what they call a 5-sigma level of uncertainty) the discovery of the Higgs Boson before December 13th, 2012?
Yes.

17: And for that matter, will they, in the same way, before the same date, accept that neutrinos (in that particular well- reported experiment or any other) can travel faster than the speed of light?
No.

18: Name a DC New 52 comic (one of the 52 launched under that banner) that won't have an issue released in August, for whatever reason. ('They'll all have one' is allowed, and what I'd hope for.)
Frankenstein Agent Of Shade

19: Other than The Lizard, name another villain who'll appear in the movie The Amazing Spider-Man. Or will there not be any other?
Man-Wolf / John Jonah Jameson

20: In what month of 2012 will the Archbishop of Canterbury retire? Or not this year at all?
June

21: Name *one* song performed or heard in Glee in a new episode shown between March 1st 2012 and December 13th, 2012. (Let's go with UK broadcast dates, which are just a couple of days after the US ones.)
Little Does She Know (originally by the Kursaal Flyers)

22: Of the actors who have played the Doctor (in any medium), who will have the most Twitter followers at midnight on October 1st, 2012? (Genuine accounts only. Anyone within 100 either way gets a point.)
Colin Baker

23: And how many Twitter followers will I have at midnight on August 1st, 2012? (Don't be rude, now. Same rule as for question 20.)
22,347

24: Which country will top the official medal table at the end of the London Olympic Games in 2012?
USA

25: Will Captain Britain appear in at least a single panel of any new Marvel (US) comic released in September 2012?
Yes

26: Who will get the Republican nomination for US President? (Just a name, please, not an essay.)
Mitt Romney

27: Will Kate Bush release any new music (that is to say, any track that has so far been unreleased) between January 1st 2012 and December 13th, 2012?
No

28: Will Peter Dinklage's character Tyrion Lannister slap anyone onscreen in Season Two of Game of Thrones?
Yes (I have never seen Game Of Thrones)

29: Will the makers of the upcoming (2013) Star Trek movie reveal that the character of Khan will be appearing in that movie before December 13th, 2013?
No

30: Who will win this year's Boat Race? Oxford or Cambridge? Or will both sink?
Oxford

********************************

More prediction fun: 7 Predictions for 2011 written for the New York Times in 1931.

Thomas Edison's Predictions for 2011 written in 1911. He appears to predict the Kindle.

Some spectacularly bad predictions for 2011 from a "leading psychic". Baby for the Obamas? Hilary Clinton to win Nobel prize? Sarah Palin divorce? First successful brain transplant? French to develop first bionic eye? Playboy mansion to burn down? Hollywood starlet to give birth to a dwarf? It's good to find someone whose clairvoyant powers are worse than mine.

Some rubbish Foreign Policy predictions from 2011.

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Some Socks sets from 2011

And, with a private party in Edinburgh done and dusted, the Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre have completed their live performances for the year. And what a wonderful and varied year it's been, with the Socks performing in the widest variety of venues. Here are just a few of them...


A nice big room in Peebles (our second appearance there, at the Eastgate Theatre).


Stafford Gatehouse, a particularly photogenic set. We return next May.


A civil partnership celebration in the Castle that Paul McCartney used to own on the Mull Of Kintyre. I know. And yes it was as brilliant as it sounds. Okay, our gig was 45 entertaining minutes worth of the festivities. Getting to join the party and to stay in the castle was even more memorable. As was the three hour drive each way from Glasgow, making it the most remote gig of 2011 (just beating Woodend Barn in Banchory, Aberdeenshire).


A field, in a less-then-well-populated festival in Lechlade, Gloucestershire. Sadly the 100 or so people who tried valiantly to fill a field were not enough for the event to make a profit. I have yet to be paid.


A gig that we never thought would work, with our set stuck in the middle of the foyer of Fairfield Halls Croydon while the audiences for two other shows filed in and out. Amazingly it went so well we return next year.


Falkirk. Er, not much to say about this one. I'm sure it was brilliant. (There was an audience, by the way, this was taken before they'd arrived. Obviously.)


And here's us in a conservatory. Again you wouldn't think this gig would work, playing to 25 people in a private house at 6.30 on a wet Tuesday night in December, but what can I say, we killed.

Most of the time I'm much too busy to take a photograph of the set (and sometimes it just looks a bit rubbish, er, that is to say I hardly do it justice) so you'll just have to imagine this year's Socks performanes at another civil partnership and two 50th birthday parties (in Margate, London and Edinburgh), our international sellouts in Aarhus and Copenhagen, the thirty-odd theatre shows that comprised our Spring & Autumn tours, and our less conventional gigs including an open air show in a hardboard mock-up of Shakespeare's Globe in a park in Windsor and a return visit to the historic Britannia Panopticon Music Hall in Glasgow which holds the record for the coldest gig of the year (they're not allowed heating, it's a conservation thing).

2012 holds the prospect of a month of nightly gigs in Adelaide and the same again in Edinburgh, with an additional 20 theatre gigs already lined up, with more to come as well as comedy clubs and the inevitable private parties, it looks like being a busy enough year to be getting on with. Here's to it.

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Video from Heather's exhibition in Bristol

Here's a treat, the brand new video of Heather's Chapman's Monkey exhibition in Bristol. Just a taster, you've got until Wednesday to see it live



And here's Heather's own blog post on the exhibition, summing it up nicely I think.

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Live from Heather's exhibition at Centrespace

Here we are at Heather's new exhibition, Chapman's Monkey, at Centrespace Gallery in Bristol, and here are the first few snapshots I've taken.











Hev's taking more photos and videos which will do justice to the works, especially the newer smaller pieces (long term Hev Tweed art lovers might recognise the larger Anubis figures who have also appeared at earlier shows). Meanwhile, anyone who's thinking of dropping in, we're open until Wednesday, 11am - 5pm.

Heather Tweed - Chapman's Monkey @Centrespace Bristol

At the German Market. Handling Stollen goods - & other trivia

Having done my last schools of 2011, with just three Socks gigs to go (Saturday Westbury, Sunday Kings Heath, Tuesday private party in Edinburgh if you're interested) the thing that's keeping our household busy at the moment (apart from the winds and storms outside - we found that missing wheelie bin by the way, thanks for asking) is the preparation for Hev Tweed's new exhibition Chapman's Monkey which opens in Bristol tomorrow night (Friday) and runs till the middle of next week. After which it's Christmas.

So new Socks videos have been thin on the ground, only one produced so far this season (Baby It's Cold Outside), and so have my diary posts. However I have managed to doodle some thoughts on Twitter, so here's a round up.

Weds 14 Dec: So how come #theimpressionsshow have dropped the Claudia Winkleman bit? It's totally the most nailled impression of the series #film2011



Returning to Leicester Comedy Festival 2012

Dec 14: For the benefit of @dailymail readers, Walking With Dinosaurs will have "reconstruction" flashed across the screen throughout #frozenplanet

Press for tea. Only in Bristol RT @CarltonJefferis

I went to the chemists, I said do have any essential oils for people who are shaky on their feet? She said Tea Tree? I said I am, yes.

Dec 13: Just finished This Is England 88. Or, as it's known in our house, And Then Nothing Happens.

Also suitable as Chinese New Year present: Scottish Falsetto Socks 2012 calendar #toodesperate?



Misfits Zombie episode is brilliant! Makes up for no Walking Dead.

They won't let me into this party because I've brought a TV channel with me. I've tried telling them, it's my +1

Phew. Just as we'd concluded 50 x 2nd class stamps had gone out with the recycling, we've found them. Thankyou Santa.

Hooray, just confirmed final Socks gig of the year, a private party in Edinburgh. Unless anyone wants to book us for Hogmanay, that's us.

It is now hailing in Clevedon. It never rains...

Did you hear Australia? Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre tickets for @adelaide_fringe now on sale. Spread the word


Dec 11: There's a band called NKOTBSB. http://www.nkotbsb.com So is that New Kids On The Back Street Boys? *tries to think of stupider names...*

Hanoi Rocksy Music #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB
U2Unlimited #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB
Durandau Ballet #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB
Boney M People #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB
Crosby Stills Nash Young Gifted & Black #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB
Wham Wham Wham! #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB
Men At Kraftwerk #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB
My Chemical Brothers #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB
Guns And Rose West #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB
Take That Petrol Emotion #nostupiderthanNKOTBSB

Dec 11: Looks like it's me and Frankie Boyle not at the Comedy Awards on Friday then.

My TV is playing The Concrete & The Clay. Must be watching ITV 4+2

(above retweeted by Ian Rankin @Beathhigh Yes, be impressed)

Dec 11: I have the vague feeling we've just followed every single person in Adelaide. Do Tweet if we missed you #adelaidefringe

I saw a film, I saw a film with you, it made me cry right through, and it was Old Yeller http://youtu.be/sWzTs5bxxnw #coldplaymadesadder

This calendar needs letting out at the back. Must be an add vent calendar.

Ho ho ho, the endings of cartoons still funny when changed to....

Dec 10: Just watched Thor for the first time. What a load of twaddle. Non-existent characters, atrocious dialogue. So many missed opportunities.

Dec 10 (tweeting throughout Casualty): Don't want to spoil ending of Casualty for +1 viewers. But, re who dies and who doesn't, Hev just said "Aah, they're still alive". Harsh.

Dr on Casualty just mentioned an Escherotomy. Is that cutting out intertwining optical illusion staircases that... *abandons contrived pun*

Girls falls into bed. Hospital full of locked doors. Tonight's preposterous Casualty's a bad Literal Version 80s pop vid. With dodgy CGI

Both Hev and I have now referred to Casualty as "your programme". I think we're in denial.

And what's with these air shafts? Who knew Casualty had the set of Alien hidden behind the walls?

Casualty is quite literally doing a Doctor Who. Blowing up their Tardis set so they can build a new one in Wales.

At the German Market. Handling Stollen goods.

Better to have a crack in your frozen canal, than a frozen canal in your crack. Edinburgh photo by @auntyemily

Dec 9: Hev refers to National Portrait Gallery as The Museum Of Faces #reviewshow

And the rest of my recent tweeting has been some rampant Youtoobling, which I might collect up if I can be bothered.





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Baby It's Cold Outside - Scottish Falsetto Sock Puppet Theatre

New from the Socks, a fresh recording of their take on the Christmas classic Baby It's Cold Outside.



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