Friday, 1 January 2010

So, what about 2010?

In none of my reviews of the year have I made much mention of the outside world. No politics, no wars, no bankers bonuses or the like. Maybe I didn't care, or maybe I feel like I've seen it all before. Certainly I've done an awful lot of nostalgicising (yes that is a word) this winter, and compared the current days to the 1970s when I was growing up. When I was a kid we had TV full of Dr Who, Come Dancing, Noel Edmonds, Bruce Forsyth, ok I've made that gag before, but my point still stands. And equally for the whole politics thing.

28 years ago I was seeing a new year in preparing for Ronald Reagan to take over as President and having lived a year and a half under Thatcher. I was only just learning about politics, and to all intents and purposes this seemed like the end of the world was nigh. Nuclear destruction was inevitable, only a revolution would save us from a police state, yada yada. And lo, guess what didn't happen? Pretty much everything we expected. What did happen? The fall of the Iron Curtain, the end of the Troubles, and the rise of middle-east based Terrorism? Who predicted those? 28 years ago who predicted the bloody Falklands war?

So, if we're looking ahead to the tens, the only thing we can safely predict is that the thing that will happen will be unpredictable. Another thing that seems highly likely is that if I personally predict something, the opposite seems to be what happens. That said, I did predict the "Master Race" line in Dr Who and the use of the Queen Vic statue in Eastenders on Xmas Day, so if I'm on a roll, can I also predict I am about to inherit an unexpected fortune from a rich relative whose existence has, until now, been a really really well kept secret.

On the basis that if I predict it it won't happen, here are some predictions for 2010:

- China will invade a bit of Russia. Pointless bare-faced greedy land grab that leads to a major world war.
- UK General Election will be won by Conservatives, landslide. BNP get two seats. Labour lose all of Scotland.
- Simon Cowell manages to copyright another TV format from the 1970s, as he has done with New Faces & Opportunity Knocks, and makes even more money. Maybe he revives Love Thy Neighbour
- The new Dr Who is rubbish and everyone stops watching it
- Britain picks a fight with a small country that doesn't deserve it and kills lots of people
- I don't win the lottery, I don't inherit a fortune, and nothing I create makes a surprising amount of money... okay this is getting too much like tempting fate, however convolutedly I try and do it.

On with the year, fingers crossed everyone.

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