Thanks once again to Felicity & Tom who threw another grand Zoom Quiz party, Hev & I had the excuse to write a couple of Unbelievable Truth scripts. I did Beano, she did Clowns. Can you spot the 5 truths smuggled in among the lies in each essay? The answers are at the foot of the post.
Unbelievable Truth – THE BEANO
The World’s Second-Longest Running Comic – The Beano was first published by Alfred Harmsworth & Co from their offices in Aberdeen in 1907.
It began life as an advertising supplement sponsored by Campbells Baked Beans, hence the name Beano . The strip on its first cover was Trumpolina The Bean Eating Fairy. She appeared alongside fellow characters Harry Koe, Runner Bean – the adventures of a teenage athlete, and a happy family of bottom burps called The Windipops. The free gift attached to the front cover of Beano No 1 was a packet of bean seeds.
To show that tastes were very different in the olden days, the first issue of The Beano included a pull-out section on the newly fashionable jazz music, a picture on the cover of a little black boy eating a watermelon, a message from Lord Kitchener, and the comic ended with The National Anthem, which readers were expected to stand up and salute while reading.
Copies of Beano number one are incredibly rare. There are only 3 known to exist, and in 2015 a copy sold at auction for a record £7000. Characters in the very first issue included Dennis The Menace, Desperate Dan, Minnie The Minx, Lord Snooty, The Bash St Kids, and Desert Island Dick. Desert Island Dick is most famous for having a desert island dick, though the follow up Fanny Island never caught on.
Dennis The Menace, famous for his stripy green jumper, his catchphrase “It’s Clobbering Time, and whose dog Gnasher is just Dennis’s hair with legs added, was named after the music hall song “Dennis The Menace Plays Tennis”. His name originally only had one N in, until it had become a playground game for children to say it as dee-niss, to rhyme with penis.
Over the years The Beano has featured many characters, none of which has ever been adapted in a TV series, stage show or theme park. Interesting Beano characters from the past include Musso The Wop, The Leather Nun, Poopy and Peepee, The Righteous Brothers, and The Vibrating Bum Faced Goats.
The Beano appears widely in popular culture. Peter Cushing is reading a copy in the film Doctor Who & The Daleks; Michael Caine is reading one in Get Carter; & the characters in Lock Stock & Two Smoking Barrells are based on the Bash St Kids. The Beano appears on the cover of albums by The Stone Roses, Eric Clapton, U2, Coldplay and The Nolan Sisters.
End of lecture (Answers at foot of blog)
Unbelievable Truth – CLOWNS
Everybody loves clowns and nobody has ever been scared of them ever. If anyone was scared of clowns, that fear would be called Pierrophobia
Clowning goes all the way back to pre-history and there are cave paintings in North America dating back 12,000 years of a big-footed character, called Rur-nal Muck-dur-nal, who is shown handing out dinosaur burgers. When, 12,000 years later, McDonalds were designing their famous clown, they could have used this classic design, but just went with a Bozo instead.
Clown face make up was invented by Dame Barbara Cartland who was just trying to put her face on and got carried away. Like all clowns, she registered her characteristic make-up design by painting it onto a dried orange. The main types of clown in ancient Roman theatre were Dopius, Sneezius, Stupidus, Grumpius, Bashfulios, and Doc. And in the Italian Comedia Dell Arte the clown is called Dell Boy his best known routine being Falling Through The Bar.
The most famous clown, the one with the big red nose and colourful face, is called a Pierrot. Their characteristic long shoes came about after Joseph Grimaldi the clown had his feet trodden on by an elephant and needed the shoes to disguise his injuries. Grimaldi was a particularly unlucky clown, having been stabbed by a lion tamer, having his leg chopped off by mistake by a surgeon, and having his head chopped off by his daughter. After that he only played bit parts.
If you really love clowns, as everybody does, you can show your appreciation in Milan by carving your name on Pagliacci’s tomb, in London by dancing on Grimaldi’s grave, and in Paris in the catacombs where you can see the embalmed body of the original Harlequin.
Every movie star loves dressing as a clown because of the extra dignity it gives you. This is why Sherlock Holmes, James Bond, Harry Potter, Lara Croft, and John Wick have all done it. John Major once attended the Houses Of Parliament dressed as a clown because, famously, both his Mum and Dad were circus clowns.
End of lecture. (Answers below)
BEANO Answers:
FACT – Black boy on cover on No 1, omitted from later reprints.
FACT – Lord Snooty , drawn by Dudley D Watkins was in Beano No 1.
FACT – Gnasher was Dennis hair & legs. Artist Davy Law told the writer he couldn’t draw dogs, so was told to just draw Dennis’s hair and add legs. Later Gnasher grew a face.
FACT – Musso The Wop (Mussolini) was in the Beano 1940 – 43. Same artist also drew Addy & Hermy, starring Hitler & Goering.
FACT – Beano on John Mayall’s Bluesbreakers, held by Eric Clapton. Nicknamed The Beano Album.
LIES you may have mistaken for truths:
The World’s Second-Longest Running Comic (NO, Longest, 3180 issues in 2015)
Published by Alfred Harmsworth & Co (NO, DC Thomson)
Aberdeen (NO, Dundee)
1907 (No, 1938)
Advertising supplement for Campbells Baked Beans (NO).
The free gift packet of bean seeds (NO, a Whoopee Mask).
There are only 3 known to exist (NO, there are 20)
Copy sold at auction for a record £7000 (NO, £17,300. Estimated now to be over £20,000).
Desperate Dan was in the Dandy, Desert Island Dick in the Topper, the others all came later.
Catchphrase “It’s Clobbering Time (NO, that’s The Thing),
“Dennis The Menace Plays Tennis” (NO, from Venice)
None has ever been adapted in a TV series, stage show or theme park (NO, Dennis has had all three, Bananaman stage show, Beano rides at Chessington World of Adventures).
The Vibrating Bum Faced Goats were in Viz
Peter Cushing is reading a copy in Doctor Who & The Daleks (NO, it’s The Eagle. Matt Smith later reads one in The Rings Of Akhaten)
CLOWN Answers:
FACT – Ronald McDonald is based on Bozo, a famous red-face clown from a 1950s kids TV show. He was also the inspiration for Krusty The Clown in The Simpsons.
FACT – Roman clown was Stupidus. Main 4 were Sannio, Stupidus (the mimic fool, hence our word stupid), Scurra (a tramp or hobo, hence scurrilous), and Moriones (hence moron).
FACT - Grimaldi’s daughter had his head removed, on his instructions, because of his fear of being buried alive.
FACT – You can dance on Grimaldi’s grave. In 2010 a coffin-shaped memorial made of musical floor tiles, was installed in Joseph Grimaldi Park in Hackney
FACT – James Bond, Roger Moore, dresses as a clown in Octopussy
LIES you may have mistaken for truths:
Pierrophobia. (NO, it’s Coulrophobia).
Face painted on an orange. (NO, it’s an egg, kept in the Clown Face Register).
Red face clown is a Pierrot (NO, it’s an Auguste).
Pagliacci’s tomb (NO, he’s fictional)
John Major’s parents were circus clowns (NO, his Dad Tom Major Ball was a music hall performer but not a clown. His mum was a dancer)